Teaching Kids Table Manners
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Catherine Said:
Why aren't more parents teaching their children manners and chivalry?We Answered:
Being polite in public and being nice to others is very important. You should treat everyone with respect. If I see someone coming in the door right after me I hold it open for them (man or woman or child). My kids see me do that and in turn will learn to do the same. I have to wonder if people are taking notice to your sister's children and "looking at her like she is crazy" then she is probably taking it too far. How old are your sister's sons. I wonder why people think of it as odd, most people will welcome a nice polite young man, but a small child that is overly polite is something to wonder about. If a small child held a door open for me I would thank them and assume that the parent would have done the same (their child learned this behavior from someone) but if I say a small child like 10 or under hold the door for their own mother I would think there was a problem. I hold the door for my children. I hope you sister is not making her 6 year old carry the groceries and pull her chair out for her. That is asking too much, they are still a child and should be treated like a child not a little short man.having said that the child that threw the fit over chips needed her bottom spanked. I know that if either of my kids did that we would have gone home (no movies for misbehaving kids) and I would have given them a spanking when we got home. That cannot be allowed. My kids are only 2 and they don't act like that. I think there is room to be a parent and a friend. My kids love to play with me and we run around and chase each other and play hide and seek and we color pictures together but they still know that what I say goes. They obey me and if they don't then they are punished and if the misbehavior is bad enough then they will get a spanking. I don't know why people assume that if you laugh and play with your kids and talk to them then you let them do whatever they want.
My husband and I work very hard at balancing fun and parenting. We want our kids to be nice and polite but we also know they are just kids. They are 2 so they only have a few rules to follow, as they get older we will add more rules and expectations, but for right now we have happy fun loving kids that are quiet and don't throw tantrums in stores. I don't expect for my 2 yr old to open the door for anyone. And I wouldn't expect them to open doors for people until they were older.
Claire Said:
do you teach your kids table manners?We Answered:
I teach a class of pre-k children and I actually had a parent question the fact I taught her child not to smack his food. The child asked her not to do it and she was furious with me. I told her I teach them a lot of different manners and she might hear more if he continued in my care. That particular one is my pet peeve!Carolyn Said:
Best way to teach kids proper table manners..?We Answered:
Have dessert every dinner and if they have good table manners then they get some and if not they don't. And that should go for every person at the table. If your husband has bad manners he does not get anything, if your son does but the daughter does not, she does not get dessert but he does. (That will be your best tool because they will compete with each other) And do not give in, ever.Victoria Said:
Modern dining is so relaxed. What are the basic table manners we should teach our kids today?We Answered:
The best you can do is to teach your kids the RIGHT WAY. Show them everything there is to know so that they will not be embarrassed when they are invited to a nice restaurant or in a situation that calls for good manners. It might seem like hard work but you are doing them a favour!!!Crystal Said:
What ever happened to teaching children table manners?We Answered:
My 12 and 9 year old daughters sometimes invite friends for dinner. I am nearly always speechless with disgust when I see them clutching their forks with their right fists, lowering their faces towards the plate and throwing the food into their mouths while their left arms lie full length on the table, curved around the plate.My daughters put their hands under the table, hold their knives and forks correctly and in the correct hands, put them down to chew, and do not speak with their mouths full. They use napkins, and do not slouch. They can tell the difference between fish knives and forks and ordinary, and dessert spoons and forks - and they eat their pudding with both spoon and fork, as it should be done. The television is turned off and closed into its cabinet, and the girls are expected to join in the conversation around the table.
The thing is, once you know how to do it properly, you can have dinner with the Queen, and not be ashamed. And you can always tone it down to suit the company. But if you can eat only like an ignorant animal, there will come a day when you go to a proper dinner, and you will not know how to eat nicely. As a result, you will feel ashamed of yourself and so inadequate and unsure.
You choose what you want for your children. If all you want is for them to work on a building site or a checkout, then fine, forget their education. They probably won't need it, if that's all you see them as being able to do. I on the other hand, am not quite so unambitious. I'll give them the very best education I can, and they'll take it from there. That includes being presentable.
Edit: Honest Freakin etc, etc - if you want to be one of the new Philistines, that is your choice, but you will be condemning your children to remain that way.
Aunt Tilly, in the literal sense, you are right. What it means however is that if you educate them to be thick, uncultivated layabouts, then thick, uncultivated layabouts they will become and stay.
The question is not essentially about table manners at school, if you read it carefully; the essence is about whether parents teach table manners, and whether they are relevant.
The questioner also mentions a visit to a restaurant. I assume that it was not some awful hamburger place, and that the people she refers to were adults and children.
Franklin Said:
what is wrong with parents theses days and teaching kids table manners. it never fails, anytime i have a meal?We Answered:
The reason childrens table manners are so bad is a/children and parents don't eat at the table anymore they eat
in front of computers and tv sets and so they don't bother to correct the children and b/ everyone eats at fast food restaurants so they are all taught to eat with their hands. I have seen teenagers and young adults using a fork and knife like they were stabbing someone. It is no wonder that schools that teach manners are springing up all over the place. These children are going into the professional workforce with major handicaps because they have such poor manners not only at the table but everywhere else as well. I was reading an article about large corporations having to send their young executives to manners school as
their behavior at business meetings and dinners was so appalling that they felt it reflected badly on the company.
Karl Said:
Teaching daughter table manners?We Answered:
It's good that you're teaching her now, just as long as your expectations are realistic according to her age. Climbing on the table is dangerous, so definitely focus on that. Throwing food isn't acceptible, but at her age it's perfectly normal to drop it on the floor.Patience and consistency.
Oh dear, why were they eating salad with their hands? Unless you were at some barbaric dinner theater that's completely uncalled for.
As far as saying grace, you don't have to, but it's a nice, just don't say it if you don't mean it. Simply thanking the higher power that provided your food, health, home, etc. doesn't cost you a thing.